Hicham El Qendouci

Love River Forever

Where do I start? 
From any wound among thousands of them, 
From the beginning of the tough infection 
Three months ago...
I suffer from pain and disease, sick with a virus 
Lurking like fire beneath my skin,
a hidden danger waiting in ambush. 
I suffer within my wounds. 
And even my weapon betrays me! 
I'm still looking for a safety, but it is safe to stay here 
Sick, homeless, hunted and besieged? 
Even our brothers drink our blood and eat our bones. 

Darkness goes on in my eyes. 
And the speech shall die in my mouth 
Until I stop asking for silence. 
Even if morning comes I can do nothing 
About leaving, except to cry. 
Where do I start? 
All our streets are closed, 
And our tongues have become spoons 
And our borders gallows. 
My yellow face hates to invade the mirror. 
Only nights of lamentations come, 
And the same old funerals and wailing. 

My heart shakes as a dead body or a massacre echoes, 
Full of flashes, colors, and sorrows, 
Waiting until a favorable star enters 
The orbit of death or the homeland of losers. 
I head to the river, a beautiful river 
Reflecting in its flowing the mixture above me 
Of planets, stars, and enormous galaxies filling the universe. 
I walk slowly, through tears, seeing clouds and stars, 
While my ears hear explosions and my hands touch flowers of light.
I long to go to a distant planet where there is no disease. 
Because I want to live in peace away from Earth. 

I feel my body trembling; 
Each organ vibrates with limitless longing 
Sometimes I think I see my love, a red flower above the beautiful river, 
And whisper gently, Sarah, my love, I love you! 
I write my love lovely poetry 
To open wondrous horizons. 
Oh, what limitless love!!
Our days might be wine, 
But our lives are silent graveyards 
Into which our eyes stare. 

Where do I start? 
Is it useful to start 
In the time of the end? 
How can I enter 
Where there is no longer a door for me 
Except the death door? 
Oh, Homeland, 
You no longer give me even a shroud, 
And I keep screaming in madness. 
Earth does not hear or care about me, 
Nor does death. 

From tent to tent 
And from place to place 
My heart is full of pain and sorrow. 
I stay awake all day and treat my burning heart alone. 
I do not see the face of anyone who 
cares about my voice or suffering. 
I have a sticky sickness in my gut, 
So I can't eat, only take water, but, 
thank God, whose mercy is revealed, 
That I still live, breathe, feel...and love. 

I know my life seems limited, 
A small light hanging in space. 
I feel like a dead planet 
Just like the Moon, Mars, and Jupiter. 
I should stop circling the Sun under which I was born 
And take the first spaceship 
To another planet in a distant galaxy, 
Away from this place of virus and disease, 
Where life may continue, 
And love flourish forever. 


All rights belong to its author. It was published on e-Stories.org by demand of Hicham El Qendouci.
Published on e-Stories.org on 04/16/2020.


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